Year: to be ascertained
Date: unknown
Time: unquantifiable
Where: The Rift Valley

Ho wakened from his sleep and sat up : What day is dis?What time is dis? he thought;What,in fact,is time ? Why is ah here?
Where is me?
What’s for eatin’? Ah is starvin’ …. Wha!

 

Ho was absolutely knocked for six ~ another Ho
Stood standing afore him.
Only this one was a wee bit  different:
This one was smaller and looked a little less hairy
From its chest protruded  two distinctly formed hillocks;
the narrow waist accentuating the broad hips
Long slender legs tapered down to two small feet.
Around the groin area, was tied a short lace-embroidered apron.
It stood before  him and bared its teeth;
He was a touch apprehensive but a little bemused
It grunted in a higher- pitched voice than his own gutterations

” What yo’ wan’ for yo tea? ”
That surprised him. sure it was good and certainly one up on a few hours ago.

“Oh! Oh … what ever yo’s havin’.
Where de hell  did yo comes from?” exclaimed Ho

“Ah is from yo side,an’ will be by yo side,for de foreseeable future

But yo makes shor yo comes fo’ yo tea when ah calls yo”

This was kinda intrrstin’
“Ah ain’t keeping it warm…

“Ah CAN’T keep it warm……
……..ah  has no fire!”
The Apron turned, stumbled down-stream in a haunched manner, turned to the sun and disappeared  through some low thick -spread shrubbery.
Oh Woe,man! thought  Holmes,
S’..he sure is uppity!”

Ho followed the Apron into the rock cave

“Wash  yo han’s afore yo sit yosel’ down ”
Holmes splashed himself at the spring and sat cross-legged on the flat slate rock
Wha will ah calls yo?

Enquired Ho
Will we meet agin’?

“Calls me in de eve’

Wha is yo call?
Al dees quessions
Yo is a damn noosenceYo is a damn ….
A damn…. thought  Eve, dat is a good name fo’ yo ”
Eve’ brought over the left hind of a decaying mongoose,
and put it on his slate plate.

“Eat all dat up now! Uttered Eve

And Adam scoffed the lot.

Editor’s comment

Thus Man first knew his place

In the kitchen of Creation

SCENE FOUR

Adam pushed the bones out of the way and wiped his hairy

Paw across his thick greasy lips

” Ah! Dat was suppa.

“Eve, yo sure can boil an egg!”

” Wha’ yo talkin ’bout?

Eggs come from de chic-kin

and dat waz no chic-kin

Get yosel’ sum edoocation

Adam felt quite humble

And to be honest a trifle miffed

Imagin bein told yo is thick by a Woeman!

Adam, brief though the meeting had been, had had enough.

“Shag him* – I’m off!”

So he did; and with a palm side swipe turned and  migrated…

*gender issues not as yet clearly defined (Ed.)

 

 

Burnt

I am an Amateur Gynaecologist with a love of Maidenhair Ferns and a fondness for interpreting Vermeer's Paintings as Metaphors ...

Recommended Articles

Leave a Reply